The key to relationship transformation is to STOP doing what doesn't work, and START doing what does. I know this sounds overly simplistic, but bear with me. Most relationships start out with both spouse's liking, loving, admiring, and serving each other. Overtime that slows down. Sadly, sometimes it stops altogether. The key is to own your part, like your spouse, and commit to meeting their needs. Your marriage is like a garden. It was beautiful and satisfying. Over time and through neglect, both you and your { maybe dirty rotten :) } spouse have a garden that needs an overhaul. It's full of weeds and due to lack of water and fertilizer it's not very productive. You get the idea. You can turn it around by changing your side of the equation.